I Need A Little Christmas Right This Very Moment

Research identifies 5 markers of a healthy family.

Traditions are one.

Think about what you look forward to most about the holidays.  I bet it's a tradition.  

One of my favorite family traditions growing up was my sister's birthday party. She was born on Christmas Eve (which she loves) and every year we had the family and many of her friends come by.  When we were in piano lessons we would put on a concert of Christmas Carols we were forced to learn (I can't believe my family members stomached through that year after torturous year). When we were little we would strut down our long hallway in fashion shows for my grandmas--my brother was always the hit of the show.  After the festivities my sister, brother, and I would have a slumber party in the bedroom my sister and I shared.  My brother and I would wake up early and try and coax my sister out of bed, which never really worked.

And my very favorite food tradition is my Grandma Hazel's "Snacks," which is homemade Chex Party Mix that she would throw in several varieties of crackers in addition to the traditional ingredients.  And every year I'd get yelled at for picking "the good things out."

L and I have started a few traditions since we've been married.  Here's one: we go to the store each year to pick out a Christmas tree ornament, each, to put on the year's tree.  This derived  from us not having any ornaments at all when we got married.  Our annual trip to the Christmas aisle has created some funny memories.  This is the ornament L picked out the first year: 

Every year since we argue about who really picked it out because L is embarrassed about it now.

This is the ornament Hippo picked out this year:

Here is the one Damnit picked out:

Later she beat it up:

Cashing in a fun tradition was well needed after the week we had.  On Monday there was a crisis involving one of my favorite clients which tore my heart apart. She will be okay, I guess, but the outcome was not optimal despite my great efforts.  Further, L found out that day he didn't get a position in the particular ICU he was hoping.  He was more disappointed than I have ever seen him. Fortunately this had little to do with his skills and work performance and everything to do with politics.  Though still disappointed we feel the place he did get a job will be beneficial for his long term plan and will open up wanted opportunities.

Tuesday evening as I was gathering my things together to leave the office I noticed I had a voicemail.  I decided to listen to it, even though I usually save end-of-day voicemail for the next day.  Unfortunately it was a guardian of one of my incarcerated clients leaving me the most threatening voicemail of my career...and life.  There were few staff left in the office and it took me several hand-wringing minutes to find security.  Don't worry too much the police are now involved and I am considering pressing charges.  My company has been very supportive in managing this situation to where I feel safe and secure (well, as good as I can possibly I guess).  The worst part of the threat had little to do with the things she said about me, but the things she said about Hippo.  Of course she doesn't know him, but since they have been my clients for some time I knew them when I was pregnant.  Therapists tend to be guarded for such reasons and it always frustrated me I was not able to hide that part of my life but I figured nothing bad would actually happen.  

That event was overshadowed by this one:  When I got home that night L informed me his dad's new wife was in a coma and expected to pass away in the next 24 hours.  We were invited to pay our last respects which I felt uncomfortable about since we are not intimate family and I felt this time should be for those who knew her and loved her most, like her parents, her siblings, and her children.  We decided, however, we should go to support L's dad.  It was a very good thing we went because when we arrived the anxiety in the home was so thick one could barely breathe.  L was able to explain the situation to her children and to his dad so they were all on the same page and understood exactly what choices they had. They finally all agreed on what was best.  L's dad called at 2:00 am to say she had passed away an hour earlier.  

Wednesday evening I began feeling a cold coming on.  By the time Thursday afternoon came around I was extraordinarily sick (with my annual sinus infection) and so I left work early canceling the remainder of my appointments. It was a HUGE mistake to cancel my own appointments.  I got chewed out by a few clients when they found out in addition to that day I would be canceling next week due to the services I would be attending for L's dad's wife.  Can you believe the nerve of some people?  I finally said to one father, "I can help a lot of things but I cannot help the fact that your son has been a slacker in his treatment for the past 18 months, nor can I help when people in my family die. Maybe I need to have the conversation with his probation officer instead of you." Needless to say he backed off but I have a grave feeling this is not the end of my clients' complaints.

In addition to all of the other crap going on this week I was not able to say goodbye to a very good friend moving to Mexico indefinitely, due to being so sick.  I also found out our other friend, who shares our babysitter, is so unsatisfied with her services, because their child gets beat up by her child, they have pulled their child.  It makes me worry Hippo will be the new target but two days notice is not long enough to find a new babysitter.  Thankfully we only need her two and a half  more days before my Christmas vacation. Also this week, L's long time best friend's child had a cancer scare but tests this week ruled that out, thank goodness.  

Even though it's been a week of tragedy, disappointment, worry, and stress we feel blessed to have our jobs, to have our health, to have our beautiful home, to have our working (barely sometimes) cars, to have a loving kitty, and to have supportive families.  It's been hard to stay in the Christmas Spirit this season but our family Christmas traditions bring us back to what's important. 

Here's a funny picture of Hippo putting the star on the tree.

What Were They Thinking?

Our administrative assistant is near retirement; she accepted the job because she was displaced when the program that she managed was closed two years ago.  She is great.  She is like our department grandma.  BUT...

She's a little rigid.  

She's a little anal.

She redirects us when we're late, when we leave something on the printer for too long, when we refuse to answer our phones, and when we do anything she feels is not productive.  

She wants to make sure everything, EVERYTHING, is done by the book.  She does not leave one rock unturned or one therapist un-lectured in her quest to be thorough.

I have to walk by her fish-bowl office in order to get to my office and so if she has things she would like me to improve upon mornings are her prime opportunity to lecture me. Unfortunately, mornings are the worst time to lecture me.

Every monday morning I do the same routine:  pretend I'm listening to her as she lectures me on leaving five minutes early on Friday, walk into her office while saying, "Mmm Hmm, Mmm Hmm", and check my box.  This Monday I noticed something oddly 3D in my box under some paperwork.  I pulled out a braided fake-hair extension.  There's a lot of things in life I don't want to touch without proper gloving and used hair extensions are no exception.  Between my pinched pointer finger and thumb I held up the hair extension as far extended from by body as physically possible and said to her in disgust, "What is this?"  

"I think that belongs to your client."  She states simply, innocently.

"Soooooo...?"

"I think it fell off her head last week after you left early Friday."  She calmly replies.

"Soooooo...?"

"You need to make sure she gets it back."  She says with authority.

I walked over to the garbage can and violently threw it away with a downward whip of my hand. And then I pumped a large amount of hand sanitizer into my palm and proceeded to dramatically sanitize my hands and the entire length of both arms.  "That is weird and gross!"  I cried as I made a swooping exit from her office.  

She means well but there's a line one should not cross.

You Have Stolen My Heart / Thanksgiving

WARNING:  If you're not family you may want to skip this one because it may be a little boring to those who don't innately love Hippo.  Hippo has taken to dancing when he is feeling the music.  He danced to the RS practice hymn last Sunday which proves he loves even church music.

Thanksgiving was Hippo's best day in his eight months of life.  He was given a lot of things to eat including turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, candied yams, pumpkin pie, apple pie and vanilla ice cream, and stuffing.  He LOVED everything and was the hit of the party.  

No, Hippo is not crawling yet.  I finally bought him a toy that claims it "encourages crawling." Hmph, false advertising.

He says "Ma" and "Mama" for me.  Folks find it funny that he yells these at me already when he wants something or if he is irritated with me.  I think he says "Ba" for food or when he is hungry, not specific to his bottle though.  He hasn't figured out that L is "Dadadadadada" yet.  

Since we ate at a restaurant for L's proclaimed favorite holiday I thought I'd make him a pumpkin pie for dessert last night.  After reviewing pie crust recipes and viewing tutorials online I chose an all butter (for the fat) recipe.  Unfortunately it didn't occur to me that this recipe was best for pre-baked pie shells until after I baked the entire pie.  So when L got home from work I wanted to show him what the bottom of the pie looked like through the glass dish so he could decide if it looked wrong or not. I'm sure you can figure out what happened next...THE PIE FELL OUT OF THE DISH ONTO MY OUTSTRETCHED ARMS!  L laughed and I cried a little.  L salvaged what he could and when I anxiously asked him how the crust turned out he said, "Well, it's a bit on the flaky side."  Despite the falling-out-of-the-dish tragedy and despite L's lack of palate sophistication I guess I succeeded after all. 

Cow Love

Jordan this one is for you!

What A Week, Turning 30 And All

I've had the best week.  Albeit an out-of-the-ordinary one.  Despite turning 30.

It all began Tuesday night when I begged, bribed, prodded, annoyed L into letting me open my birthday presents early. He refused unless I agreed to outrageous circumstances which I refused but continued feeling as excited as I have ever felt for a birthday, as excited as I was when still a kid anticipating Christmas. I kept reflecting on how I should be feeling old and stressed about turning 30.  What's weird is that I haven't felt bothered by it yet.

Wednesday morning L got up with Baby (but known as Hippo from now on) and I slept in until my giddiness, five minutes later, propelled me to jump out of bed and run downstairs to my waiting pile of presents. Hippo helped me rip the paper from my new MacBook Pro and a new printer (I've been wanting one in my office since I started work even though I will have to eat exactly two less mini candy bars per day to make up for calories I will be saving due to not having to walk the 50 yards to the printer 10 times per day).

Then we got dressed and went to breakfast at my favorite diner/dive.  Before my french toast got to me Hippo dumped a cup of ice water onto my lap and pooped making us realize we didn't bring a darn diaper bag.  I didn't even get annoyed and Hippo didn't even get diaper rash.  

Later that day I attempted to alter my body permanently and was foiled; more on that later.

L attempted to have a family party that night but no one could come and so we bought pizza and ice cream cake for the neighbors and plotted with friends to take a trip the next day.

We rose early Thursday morning to pack and shop.  By 10:30 am we were headed to Mink Creek, ID.  The best thing about going to Idaho is the Idaho State Lottery.  I spent $10 only to win $3.  The excitement, anticipation, and scratching is totally worth the extra $7.  I spent the next 24 hours sitting on the Mink Creek couch being entertained by Hippo and our friends' three kids (and eating junk food).  Hippo was completely enthralled by their three year-old spending most of the trip gazing at him and trying to engage him.  

Hippo didn't help L catch these but he sure thought they were cool.

We arrived home just in time to mass clean the house for a friend party.  Getting take out and staying up until 3 am isn't like it was when I was 21 but it was still super fun to have 3 therapists, two nurses, a cop, and a chemical engineer in the house.  You can just imagine the stories!!!

I had to get up early the next morning to get this:

Yep.  That's right.  Your eyes do not deceive you.

Don't worry, if you feel like leaving a rebuking comment you should know I have been thoroughly rebuked by family and friends.  AND, I realized before the needle plunged through the dermis that I was making a mistake, that the prophets have advised against it, that I may regret it (don't yet), and that I am setting a bad example to family members, clients, and prosperity.  I chose to do it anyway.  Though it won't seem reasonable to you (and probably won't to me in the future), a girl who works with criminals everyday of her life sometimes needs to rebel herself and let off a bit of steam, hopefully always in legal ways.  

To answer your questions--it is about 2 inches in diameter on my right shoulder blade.  It will only be visible when I swim and workout.  It only hurt a little bit.  It feels like a cat scratching you over and over again in the same place.  It didn't hurt at all afterward and the only residual annoyance is that it is currently itchy.  It took about 10 minutes to do.  John, my personal artist, had 16 years of experience and yes, had his entire body covered besides his face.  Out of all of us there I think mine was the most tasteful--one guy was getting a huge Virgin Mary on his shin and a girl was getting some Chinese symbols on her muffin top.  Seeing that was probably the worst part of the entire experience.  Hippo went to the Weber State football game while L supported me in my sinfulness.

Shortly after the completion of my body art we had to rush to SLC to watch Hippos Grandpa Ray wed for the 4th time.  Sadly, his new wife was unable to stand during the ceremony as she is currently suffering from stage 4 lung cancer.  What a mix of emotions.  That's all I have to say about that.

Sunday L had to work and I was scheduled to teach RS.  I had to get Hippo up and ready and to church all by myself.  Wow, that was hard.  Since L wasn't at church my mother-in-law held him while I taught and he got so excited to see me up at the front and to hear my voice he kept yelling at me to get my attention and then screatching when I would look in his direction Eventually she took him out because I began laughing at him instead of teaching.  You might be wondering if I had any guilt while teaching knowing I had just had ink done--not at all.  The lesson was about magnifying your calling.

Back to work today after a 5-day weekend.  After an awesome one like that it wasn't so bad going back to work.  For those I've neglected to tell, I have been invited to work part time at my job and so I will not be quitting after all.  And every weekend, then, will be a 5-dayer.  The rest of the time I am going to hang out with this guy:

Eight Months

My mommy is going to be busy turning 30 years-old Wednesday when I really turn eight month and so we have to do an update on me post today.

I should have been busy in my seventh month.  But instead of learning to sit up on my own, rolling from my tummy to my back, getting up on my hands and feet, and dare-I-say crawl I spent this month freaking out and regressing.  It all started with my two top teeth coming in. They caused me a lot of trouble because they hurt really bad and I couldn't sleep very well.

When the teeth stopped bothering me I began to go through what my Auntie Lala says is object permanence.  This is an important time for babies my age because learning object permanence helps children become emotionally well-adjusted.  Kids that don't learn it will develop attachment and other mental health disorders and will show up in Mommy's office in a few years.  They often grow up to have problems being in relationships, have trouble regulating their emotions, have temper problems, and are at a high risk to abuse drugs and commit crimes.  Modern science has shown that kids who do not learn object permanence actually have physiological differences in their brains=brain damage.  Even though my mommy and daddy about went crazy they knew it was important to be patient with me even when I cried all night and was grumpy all day.  This lasted for three weeks and now that it is over Mommy, Daddy, and I are sleeping a lot better and we all are in better moods.  

My Daddy took me to the doctor when I was really out of control and he checked to make sure I was still healthy.  The doctor said I am very healthy even though my acid reflux (which actually should be called GERD due to the painful symptoms I have) is very bad.  The doctor is still not worried about me though and this time the doctor explained patiently to my Daddy that there is nothing that will really help me except growing up and growing out of it.  Even though my Mommy got frustrated with the "there's nothing we can do" answer, it has helped her relax a little bit and feel more assured that I will be okay.  They added a new formula twice a day to make the formula heavier in my tummy so I don't spit up as much--it sort of works but it is even more expensive than my Soy formula which makes my mommy feel stressed out when she goes to the store to buy it for me.  That didn't stop her from buying me this puffy vest though.

  

Today my second cousin, who is 10.5 months-old, came over and crawled around my house like he has been crawling since he was six months-old (oh, he has been) and my mommy told me to watch him to learn how.  I didn't want to watch him and I felt offended that she was comparing me to him. Maybe I won't ever crawl.  Some people say that babies who don't crawl have problems reading which of course makes my mommy worry even more.

I still love my mommy and daddy best.  I really like my daddy to rough house with me and I like it when he throws me into the air and makes me ride on his head.  My daddy says it hurts his feelings that I refuse to allow him to feed me before bed but it's just that my mommy does it so I feel content and sleepy.  I love my kitty and I love books--especially ones that pop up.  I love my babysitter and her son who is my best friend--we give each other kisses.  I play kissy-face with my mommy too.  I like to sit in the front of the shopping cart and in a high chair at restaurants.  My favorite food is cherry and apples mixed together and any type of squash.  My mommy tries to give  me treats to crawl but I still refuse to and then I demand more treats!

I can say lots of different sounds now but I don't really know what any of them mean yet.  My Grandpa Con thinks I am going to be a great intellect but not a very good athlete...which makes my daddy mad and my mommy laugh.  My mommy says it is just too soon to tell.

I am about 20 pounds now and I am busting  out of my nine month clothes.   My mommy doesn't mind because she loves to shop.  Just not for formula!!!

The Month To Give Thanks

November is the time to give thanks. Well, thank you to the following:

Threats—without them I wouldn’t have a job

The lady who cut me off nearly killing me and Baby this morning—because seeing her a mile later on the side of the freeway with smoke pouring out from the hood reminded me that Karma makes life worth it

My company’s IT department—giving me an excuse to have a bad attitude

People with poor hygiene—because they make me look good

Gossip—gives me something to talk about

The 11 fast food restaurants within a mile from my house—for allowing me to give myself a treat each time I don’t eat there

Teenage Angst—earns me a paycheck

Family Feuds—gives me an outlet for my aggression

My Slow Work Computer—the reason I stare out my office window and gaze at the Purple Mountains Majesty instead of completing my paperwork

Other People’s Problems—making me thankful for my own

My Problems—making me thankful I have these problems and not those problems

Idaho, As an Oregonian—75 MPH B……iotch! And that is the only reason Idaho is to be thanked

IPhone—makes me look more important than I really am

Baby crying all night long—‘cause I’m always looking for a reason to miss Monday’s staff meeting

Food Poisoning—A quick way to lose those extra pounds

Politics—makes it socially acceptable to say socially unacceptable things about people

Gangs—without which my current nemesis wouldn’t have had their car tagged last week. HAHAHAHAHA! Nothing beats a large SK on the passenger door, eh?

Dexter—I’ve never had such a good time questioning my morality

V8 Engines—an excuse to never be the driver

L forgetting chapstick in his pocket for the umpteenth time when I do the laundry—the reason I have the most expensive pair of jeans I will ever own

4 year-olds—for saying what we’re all thinking

Good Intentions—for paving the road to hell I’m on, it's a lot less bumby now

My brother and sister-in-laws on L’s side—never a dull minute. And for giving me something to look forward to in Spring and Fall, the bi-annual swimming pool cleaning. You’ve never heard such yelling, swearing, crying, and screeching coming from a neighbor’s yard.

My Father-in-Law’s Twine Pile—looking at it from Google earth is a wonder

What are you thankful for this year?

Roastin

Summer/Fall '08

Now that winter is finally here in Utah I though I would update you all on my adventures and projects. As you can see in the following picture, you might be thinking to yourself; what in the heck is that? 

That my friends is a chile roaster. Built by yours truly and my good friend Andy. Andy and I had been dabbling in farmers markets over the summer only to find our hard work was not paying of in the amount that we wanted it to. About the middle of the season we decided to built this awesome contraption thinking we hit the jackpot. We knew that chile roasters are a huge deal and they are very hard to come by in the state of Utah. Let's just say for legal complications to make it short. Anyways we built this thing, however it took us 3 weeks to build. We both had other jobs so we could only do it in our spare time. That left little time to not much else. Yep you guessed it, that drove M bonkers. She was spitfire mad about the whole thing. The nice thing about it was that we knew a guy (Andy's dad) who is in the steal business and most of it was made from scrap steal. So it did not cost us a whole lot. The bad thing was it took us so long to build that we missed the season and only made about $150. Although this year was a bust, we are ready for next year. Bring on the chile's.

On Monday's I have a morning meeting with my internship in which we meet with all the ICU managers and discuss how the past week went. This meeting goes from 8am-12pm. So after that me and some cohorts decided that would be a great time to mountain bike. I was only able to make it a couple of times due to other chile and baby arrangements. But here are a couple of collateral damage pictures.

We Veto'd the Monkey

Halloween is super fun

Even though the monkey won in the polls Baby's nickname is Hippo.

Hippo and JoseJay. This is only the 2nd time JoseJay has held Baby in seven months.

"Trick or Treat!"

Okay, Okay, OKAY! We know he looks like an idiot and will FREAK out when he is old enough to understand that his parents dressed him as a HIPPO for his first Halloween, but we just could NOT resist!

Recipe of the Month

Bowel Moving Fruit Salad

1  cup   Activia Light Vanilla Flavored Yogurt

2 cups  Fruit Medley

Cut desired fruit and berries into bite size chunks.  

If you use peaches, pears, pears, or bananas make the pieces a bit larger than bite sized because the yogurt will break them down.  

I usually do the following combination of fruit:

1 cameo apple

1 banana

2 peaches

1 small bunch, grapes, halved

10 strawberries, halved

This is super quick, super good, super healthy and super worth it if your feeling a bit compacted.  If you don't think this sounds good, just try it and you will be really surprised.  By the way, this feeds only two and so make more than you think you need because it is so good people will eat loads of it--L and I fight over it and usually eat so much of it we don't feel like dessert (yeah, that's right).  Another reason to make extra is so you can have it for breakfast tomorrow morning.  Other fruit possibilities:  canned mandarin oranges, fresh pineapple, plums, various berries, mango, tangelo, and oranges.

A Rose By Any Other Name

Therapy doesn't have to be complicated. At my best, things can be summed up on one or two lines:

In response to a 15 year-old boy who came into therapy one day with his hair fashioned exactly like mine--hair dye and all:

"I'm not sure whether I am flattered or creeped out."

In response to an 18 year-old boy who stormed into my office shouting nonsense:

"Shut the hell up or GET THE HELL OUT!" (He shut the hell up)

In response to a not-so-hygienic 15 year-old girl's compliment that I always look cute:

"The secret is in showering every day." (She still doesn't shower every day)

In response to a grandmother's ambivalence about whether to continue raising my client, large attitude and all:

"YOUR indecision is the problem, not her." (She made up her mind to keep my client no matter what and they no longer need therapy)

In response to the mother who does not like the child she adopted, my client:

"Have you considered getting a therapist?" (She did and she is feeling much better, so is my client)

In response to many parents who actually bring their child in for therapeutic intervention to address a chief complaint that their child will not do chores without a fight:

"I have just two rules you must follow in order to get them to do chores and you won't like either one.  First, don't give them chores; second, if you choose to disregard rule one, do the chores with them."  (Usually they disregard both rules)

In response to a 17 year-old boy's complaint that his teacher is rude to him and won't listen to him after he called her a mother f------- b----:

"What you're experiencing is a case of bad behavior evidenced by your bad behavior here, at home, at school, and in the community.  When you are experiencing a particularly bad bout of bad behavior, like you clearly are, people don't like you and they certainly don't listen to you." (This was in group and the other boys gave him specific examples of his bad behavior--love it when a group catches my momentum)

In response to the parents of my 67 clients when they complain about getting their child out of school to come to therapy, because they might do badly if they miss:

"Make a determination which is more important--good grades or being emotionally healthy.  I support you either way."     AND/OR

"Those who are good students do well anyway.  Those who are poor students are poor students with or without therapy."  (They really hate this one and will usually complain again in our next session)

In response to the millions of times I've heard this "You don't understand.":

"You're right.  Help me understand." 

In response to the 14 year-old kid who had abused a 7 year-old cousin when he told me I was brainwashing him:

"Yep.  Something I am willing to do to make sure no other child or human being is ever hurt by you again."  (He was sent, by his judge, to a residential treatment center one week later when he re-offended)

In response to the hundreds of thousands of times I've been asked this, "You haven't ever used drugs have you?":

"You know we therapists have a name for that question--the million dollar question.  (Gets 'em every time and I have never answered this question)

In response to when parents, of kids who have abused other kids, question me, "Why in the world would someone like you do something like this?"

"The answer has everything to do with the stereotyping you are doing right now."  (Ouch...and they don't think they themselves need therapy)

In response to when parents ask me when their kid is going to be done with court-ordered therapy:

"Have you asked your kid?"  (The kid then gets yelled at)

In response to when parents want me to talk to their child one-on-one to see if they have been abused:

"Why would they tell a virtual stranger they are alone with in an office with the door closed?"

In response to the parents who complain they can't get in to see me often enough:

"You know a good therapist when it's hard to get in to see them.  We have other therapists with more availability."  (They never change therapists. I don't say this to those I am sick of)

That's it for now.  I hope you have enjoyed the free therapy!!!!

7 Month Itch

This Sunday Baby turns 7 months-old.  Despite his maturity in months he refuses to roll from his back to his front, get onto his hands and knees, or even think about crawling.  I snapped this photo while he was very briefly entertained by me before he rolled over.  He has accomplished back bending and pulling himself into the sitting position from lying barely inclined.  Notice these skills are back skills and NOT stomach skills.

Baby has a sense of humor.  I'm not sure if he thinks everything is funny (evidenced by the fact that he finds L funny) or if he has tasteful humor (evidenced by the fact that he finds me funny). He laughs often even when tired, grumpy, or hungry.  His ability to be distracted from discomfort with humor has been a huge change from the early weeks.  A few nights ago he woke up in the middle of the night in teething pain and as I rocked him for hours every once in awhile he would open his eyes, look at me, and start laughing.  I'm glad he found it funny.

He is extraordinarily interested in people.  Taking him to a restaurant or a store is his greatest entertainment; he will occupy himself by people watching.  Unfortunately, due to a lack of social skills, he has developed a staring problem.  Strangers don't say much other than, "Oh, what a cute little baby" but family and friends make comments like, "Uh, your baby is staring me down."   His staring is intense as evidenced by the lowered eyebrows...   

He went through a teething spell this week starting with an all-nighter Saturday.  His bottom teeth appeared one day without any sort of symptom or sign of discomfort.  The two top teeth finally broke through today (what a relief) after severe signs and symptoms of discomfort for days.  We went through an entire bottle of pain reducer trying to keep it manageable for him. In fact, the babysitter became so desperate she gave him a pickle to chew on (he refuses teething rings).  He loved it and came home yesterday and today smelling like dill brine.

His main loves in life are:  his cloth diapers (used as spit rags), his parents, his best friends (his babysitter and son), his aunties and uncle, himself in the mirror, being outside, music, and food. He loves to eat so much he would eat all day if we let him.  Unfortunately his babysitter lets him.  He tantrums in his high chair unless eating.  He cannot handle himself if we are eating something different than he is.  How does he know already?  He demands to drink out of our cups (L's fault) and reaches for anything he sees go into our mouths.  One of his favorite toys is his spoon, occupying himself by feeding himself air.  

He still likes music and music videos.  His favorite song right now is actually one I sing him--sung to the tune of Henry the VIIIth.  I come up with stupid rhymes relevant to what we are doing and he LOVES it.  His favorite popular song is "It'll All Get Better With Time" by Leona Lewis.  His favorite rock song is Metallica's "The Day That Never Comes."  His favorite country song is a tie between three:  Heidi Newfield's "Johnny and June, Brad Paisley's "Waiting On A Woman," and "Love Story" by Taylor Swift.  It surprised me that he started liking rock and alternative which he started out not liking much of.  We played him Elvis's "Jailhouse Rock" on the day he wore this outfit and he squealed in delight so I've made plans to download a bunch of Elvis and play it on a day we are home together.

He is loving.  He gives open mouthed kisses and still loves to be held.  Even though he has a mind of his own, he is not independent at all.  He wants to go everywhere I go in the house and is not content to play/occupy himself even for a few minutes.  As long as I am there with him he can play/occupy himself.  One of his favorite things right now is to sit by me when I fold laundry and play with a toy while intermittently pulling things off the folded laundry pile.  

The only other trick he has is giving me a high five.  He refuses to clap despite my efforts launched a few hours after he was born.  

Being A Client For A Change

Here is a link to a recent news story about a law enforcement training called Crisis Intervention Team I participate in twice yearly. The purpose of the training is to teach empathy to law enforcement so they can interact more appropriately with those suffering with mental illness in order to have non-violent outcomes and to link needy people to community supports and services. This program has had wonderful results across the nation with a reduction of arrests, a reduction of violence, and a reduction of inappropriate placements into jail.

Last year I was thrown to the ground and handcuffed during one of our scenarios. I began writhing on the ground not to resist but because the knee slammed into my back really hurt. As a result of my violent arrest I sustained injuries: a five inch scratch on my back which took weeks to heal (and scarred for months) and several scrapes and bruises. My eyes were opened to how law enforcement interacts with mentally ill community members (I wondered, who should we really be afraid of...?) and I was able to provide redirection and feedback about a more appropriate response and suggest conflict resolution techniques. Though not arrested this year, I was still able to teach the officers how to best react in high stress/chaotic situations for optimal outcomes. The officers said the skills they learned give them more confidence in the field. Now that's a community in which I want to live!

Sadly, I am blocked by a rafter in the part of the clip I am in.

It's Official

My resignation was announced at staff meeting today. I haven't decided if my last day will be Christmas Eve or New Year's Eve yet but I will be done for sure by January 1, 2009.

I'm pretty excited but worried and scared and sad too.

I am excited for the following reasons:

-No more neck strains due to nodding for nine hours per day (my colleague was called a bobble head the other day)

-No more packing Baby's diaper bag each Sunday night, inevitably I forget one crucial item each week and when the babysitter points it out I feel like the world's worst mother

-No more 10:30 pm bedtimes

-No more waking Baby up at 7:00 am

-No more fighting traffic

-No more snowy icy stressful commutes

-No more crisis phone calls

-No more stinky clients

-Free time (maybe this just exists in my imagination of what stay-at-home motherhood is)

-Naps

-Reading books

-A clean house

-Hobbies

-Grocery shopping outside of Saturdays and rush hour (between the hours of 5:30-6:30 pm)

-Attending Baby's well checks

-Administering to Baby's needs

-Feeding Baby how I want to feed him

-Knowing that Baby is as safe as I can make him

-The El.len Deg.eres Show

-Volunteering

-Cooking elaborate meals

I am worried and scared for the following reasons:

-The economy is bad and is this the best time to quit a job?

-I have had a job since I was 15 years-old

-I get bored and depressed very easily when I have the option of watching television all day every day (although, we did get Ti.vo the other day and that has dramatically increased my overall life satisfaction by at least 25%)

-When I get bored I like to spend money on shoes...a lot of money on shoes

-I am not convinced that I am cut out to be a stay-at-home mom

-I am most social at my job. I tend to be an introvert in other social environments

I am sad for this one reason: I love being a therapist. I knew I wanted to be a therapist when I read There's A Boy in the Girl's Bathroom in the fifth grade. I have worked hard to get here. I love my job. I love my co-workers. I love my clients. I really really love my clients. I am good at being a therapist.

As a result of helping many people find meaning in a dreary world and in dreary circumstances I have found more meaning, happiness, and fulfillment than I could have ever imagined for myself. I am proud of the therapist I have become and I am proud of the work I have done. Seeing that go is like walking away from Baby every morning at the baby sitter's...

CHS get to it! M-O-V-E, move it

This is my Canby Cougar Football outfit that my Grandma Debi got me.  Go Cougars!  How are they doing this year Grandpa?

H dog laughing

Don't You Wish Your Baby Was Cute Like Me?

This is the first thing I bought Baby after I found out I was prego.  I waited a whole year to have him wear it.  It's cute, huh?

Update on Me Part III--I'm Six Months

Look at me!!!!  I'm jolly!!!!  I still love my mommy and daddy and kitty.  I really LOVE to eat.  My favorite foods are:  plums, bananas, yellow squash, and oatmeal.  I get mad when my mommy doesn't let me eat the food she is eating.
I am 17.5 lbs which is in the 50%ile and I am in the 75%ile in height.  This means I am tall and a little skinny--even though I look chubby.
I still hate to take naps but my mommy and daddy force me because they say I get too grumpy. I can say "lalalalalalala" and "dadadadadadadada" when I am happy and "mamamamamama" when I'm mad or sad.  And I have two teeth on the bottom!  I like to bite my mommy and daddy and my toys.  I am really good at petting Damnit nicely.  I watch myself in the mirror and chit chat with myself.  Speaking of chit chatting, I like to tell people off, talk in church, and talk to my babysitter.  I still like my baths and I splash a lot, and I think it's funny when my mommy gets wet.  I love it when Damnit comes in the bathtub with me and drinks my bath water, even though my mommy says that is gross.
I REALLY like books and I read everyday with my mommy or daddy.  I like ones that make noise and ones that I can touch.  I still have acid reflux and my doctor prescribed another medicine to help with that and with my bowel movements (my mommy said I have to use that phrase)--it is working okay.  

My mommy is thinking of quitting her job to stay home with me during the daytime because she is really sad to only hang out with me for a couple of hours a day.  

I am so friendly and outgoing I get along really well with everyone.  I don't feel stressed about strangers at all.  But I do get worried when I can't see anybody.  I don't like it when my mommy, daddy, or babysitter leaves me alone to play with my toys and I will FREAK OUT when I realize I can't find anyone.  

I Got Called to Teach RS

You may be having one of three reactions:

1.  Laughing hysterically

2.  Thinking, 'What in the...?'

3.  Wondering what RS is

I did all three when the bishop broke the news to me...just kidding.  I mostly had a panic attack.

The minute I decide to magnify my first calling ever I get released and get called to do one of the most feared jobs in the church (only outdone by Gospel Docterine Teacher, Bishop and above callings, and RS president).  

Thank goodness I don't have to teach out of the Joseph Smith book.  I am grateful because if you have recently listened to a lesson out of it, or have recently read something out of it you understand that I, being church-dumb, don't get it.  

I have to teach out of the Ensign.  This may be indicative of my experience with the Ensign:

RS presidency member:  Hi Myndi.  Thanks for accepting the call to be a teacher.

Myndi:  Uh, er...hmm...sure.

RS PM:  Well, if it makes you feel any better we'll have you teach the 4th Sundays and you will be teaching from the conference edition of the Ensign.  The stake picks out the lesson for you.

Myndi:  Phew.

RS PM:  (Laughingly) Well, do you have a copy?

Myndi:  Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm no.  BUT, I can get online.

RS PM:  I guess you can have mine.

I even told her I am a crappy teacher this morning when she delivered the Ensign to my door. She didn't seem to care.  I'll keep you posted about how things go.

So the moral of this story is:  If you don't want a crappy calling, don't magnify the one you've got.  JUST KIDDING, but keep posted for an upcoming entry about my thoughts on 'attitude.'

What Should Baby Be for Halloween?

I can't decide because they are all so cute. I didn't include the lion costume I found but it is super cute too.

You can preview the costumes here:

Hippo

Lil' Devil

Elephant

Monkey

A Parenting Tip

Parenting is hard. What a cliche, but I can't help saying it because it is so freaking true.

Just when I get the hang of something (e.g. diaper changing, 2 am feedings, soothing, bathing, humoring, pacifying, etc.) Baby begins a new developmental milestone.

I just got the hang of bottle feeding him without having a load of puke to clean up while, at the same time, getting all the gas out so he wasn't screaming in abdominal distress for hours when The Book (no, not The Good Book, the baby book I read to teach me how to take care of Baby) and the pediatrician indicated it was time to start solids (and the babysitter, and my mother-in-law, and the lady at the store, and my friends, and my visiting teacher, and my neighbor, and my co-workers, and the Internet, and and and and).

So we did.

And even though every child with a camera-owning parent has pictures like these I've just about lost my patience with food going EVERYWHERE instead of inside the mouth AND down the esophagus.

We are on a time schedule in the morning and Baby doesn't seem aware to that fact. It is imperative that at this feeding we are somewhat efficient because neither of us can afford getting less sleep (i.e. get up earlier) to accommodate such a food fiasco. Part of the problem is that he wants to use the spoon and feed himself. Cool, but also annoying, messy, and slow. Every time I move the spoon toward his mouth he grabs at it with both hands and if he latches on he does not let go at any cost...and the food keeps flying around the kitchen.

I one-upped him though. I decided to hold his hands down with one of my own and fed him with my free hand. This has a 50/50 chance of working since he's good at weaseling and wrestling his hands free and if you know babies once their hands are free from restraint they flail them around crazy-like which causes even more food flying around the kitchen.

I finally caught on. All of you parents out there probably figured this one out long ago but parenting, much to my chagrin, has not come easy to me nor do I have much of that parenting 'common sense' to which all of those books and human resources often refer . Anyway, this morning I gave him a separate spoon to fiddle with while I fed him. He ate his cereal in 10 minutes flat and only had food on his face, neck, hands, arms, bib, and the high chair tray.

And his new favorite food is plums.

Moab

In a previous entry I described unique things about Utah. I failed to mention Moab. I had never been until last week when I attended a conference there. Moab is heaven to outdoor recreationalists.

Five miles north of Moab is Arches National Park (but I didn't know that until I got to Moab). I first went to Arches 10 years ago with some friends. That time we didn't have time to hike to Delicate Arch and so come hell or high water I was going to hike it this time. You know Delicate Arch, it's the one on the Utah license plate. Maybe you don't know that...when I came home and was, what I thought was, bragging to the Utah-Native in my family, Luke, that I had hiked to Delicate Arch he said, "Mmmm," translated to I-Don't-Really-Care. And then a few minutes later said, "Why didn't you hike to the famous one?" (I'm going to remember that for my coming soon Quirks Pt. II post under Luke: Doesn't know famous Utah landmarks even though he has lived here all of his life).

I traveled to the conference with three other W.HS employees, all working in a different unit than me. I am only familiar to two of the three, and them I, as the fact that we all work at the same building. The third and I went to this conference last year together, but with one of my direct co-workers who happens to be a good friend. Last year, this guy was a total buzz-kill (if I drank...although I needed a drink after 5 minutes of interaction). So lame. In fact, he refused to eat meals with us (we are there for three days), talk to us (the drive is 5 hours long), hang out with us out of the conference, or hang out with us during the conference (he sat across the room, alone). But the weird thing is, he totally said hi to me in the office after that conference.

This year, he was equally lame...for totally different reasons. He REFUSED to go to arches. Apparently he has been promoted between this year and last and so he is a supervisor over his team. He exerted his 'authority' by passively aggressively refusing to go. What I mean is he would joke around the subject but wouldn't give a definitive answer and he kept hold of the company vehicle keys. Since he is a supervisor of course nobody wanted to risk insubordination by confronting him or by forming a mutiny.

Like I said, I was going to hike Delicate Arch come hell or high water...

And so I sought out the best therapist I know, who happened to be at the conference, and tattled. She has been working for W.HS for nearly 30 years and she loves hiking and Arches so much she owns a condo in Moab. She is willing to risk insubordination and she told him off, in a therapeutic way. I've been told off in a therapeutic way by her before and it sucks...bad...I watched with smugness as his face fell with submission during her rebuke--it was like watching a gushing waterfall at spring run-off. He not only gave in but changed his attitude from passive-aggressive to sickingly-pleasant.

So we paid the $10 and went to Arches National Park. I had forgotten how breath-taking it is. Despite not being prepared, I hiked 3 miles uphill on slick rock in wooden flip flops with zero traction, with no water, and with no hair tie. Yes I got sweaty, thirsty, and loads of blisters including between my big and index toe, the entire ball of each foot, and on top where the flip flop straps are. It was worth it. I'm just

not sure what made it more worth it--the view or the change in Supervisor's attitude and behavior.

Since I wasn't prepared with my camera I used my phone camera which doesn't give you a great idea of how spectacular this scene really is--but no camera could. If you haven't been to Arches National Park it is definitely worth the off-the-beaten trail to get there. Southern Utah offers much more than Arches including the equally dazzling Bryce Canyon, Goblin Valley, and Hell's Canyon. And the Grand Canyon is only a hop-skip-and-a-jump away.

BTW, Supervisor hasn't said hello to me since! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Recipe of The Month: Garden Corn Salad

A summer treat combining garden flavors I love:

4 cobs of sweet corn
3 scallions, chopped
1/2 cucumber, peeled and seeds removed and cut into quarter inch dice
1/2 jalapeno pepper, seeds and ribs removed and diced very fine
1/4 c cilantro, roughly chopped
1 lime
kosher salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste

Cut the corn kernels off the cobs and blanch them in boiling water for three minutes (If you want to sweeten up your corn add 1/4 cup of granulated sugar to the boiling water before you blanch the corn). Drain the corn and run under cold tap water to stop the cooking.

Combine the corn, scallions, cucumber, jalapeno, and cilantro in a medium bowl. Squeeze the juice of the lime over the mixture and season with the salt and pepper. Let the mixture sit at room temperature for 20 minutes for the flavors to combine. This is a cold or room temperature salad.

You can leave the chile out or you can add more. Or you use any chile you like/have on hand.

My Garden Corn Salad is really good with anything. I used it as a salsa for tacos last night. But it can be used on top of grilled/sauteed fish, in burritos, as a salsa with tortilla chips, as a relish on a green salad, or as a stand alone side. Enjoy!

Going Granola

You will not believe what I've been up to.

Now that the Olympics are over I have a lot of spare time on my hands. Baby's mood and napping continues to improve that the time I have found myself with has sent me into accomplish-weird-and-strange-things mode.

I have been making baby food.

Living on a farm produces a lot of produce. I figured it would save me $$ if I utilized the goods at my fingertips and made my own baby food. Plus, my garden was ultra fabulous this year and there was no way I could possibly consume 1,000,000 zucchini (that is really not that big of an exaggeration).

So far I have done: plums, green beans, yellow squash, zucchini, and corn. I will also, by the summer's end, do peaches, pears, cantaloupe, carrots, and apples (and maybe apricots).

If your interested boil the desired fruit/vegetable for a really long time--longer than you think. Drain. Puree in a food processor until everything is just about smooth. Sometimes you will need to add 1/4-1/2 cup of water to help maintain a thin texture. Fill ice trays with the puree and place in a freezer until frozen. Pop the frozen puree out and fill a zipper bag and store in the freezer until baby is hungry.

Update on Me Part II

My daddy calls me his boy

My mommy says I'm cute and smart

I like to visit my mommy at work.  I used to get so much therapy before I was born that I've been going through withdrawls!

On my four month checkup my doctor said I was handsome.  He also said I was in the 75th percentile for weight and height.  I turn 5 months Tuesday!

My acid reflux is still really really bad.  But, my mommy has finally figured out how to give me my medicine so I ingest most of it and I spit up none or little of it.  In turn, that has been helping me a lot with my attitude and my sleeping.

Here are some developmental milestones I am doing:

-I now sleep almost 10 hours at night

-I take three naps per day, hopefully totaling five to six hours

-I will nap in my crib now, but I still prefer my swing

-I eat oatmeal because even though I started out liking rice cereal, it was harder on my reflux

-I am able to roll both ways--from my back to my front and from my front to my back--but I usually refuse unless no one is looking.  My mommy has only seen me roll a few times but she has certainly found me in different positions which tells her I do roll.

-I squeal, scream, and holler

-I play with all of my toys.  My new favorite toy is a fabric book that crinkles when I touch it that my Grandma Beth gave me

-I can hold my own bottle for at least five minutes while my mommy washes dishes.  Sometimes I don't want to though, and I just want her to hold me.

-I only cry about an hour per day which is average for a baby my age

-I like to grab my toes and even suck on them when I don't think my mommy is watching

-I like to chew on everything, mostly my fists

-I can spit bubbles and my food

Here are things I really like:

-My mommy, daddy, and kitty Damn (except we're calling her Wu right now because of the Olympics)

-Eating

-My swing

-My toys

-Being outside, I will even forget I am grumpy and hungry and tired

-Being social

-My babysitter

-My babysitter's son (I cry and throw a fit when he doesn't pay attention to me)

-Music and music videos

-Joshua from So You Think You Can Dance

-Kisses

-Funny noises

-My mommy's fake vibrato

-My bath time

-Books, especially those animal ones you can touch the different textures

-Being tickled

-Parties and BBQs

-Attention

-The Olympics, especially volleyball

-Teasing my uncle AJ (My mommy talks for me and tells him that I will be his cheerleader when he is in the NBA--he really hates the idea of me becoming a cheerleader)

-That cheerleader moving, Bring It On

-Texting

-Cell phones and remote controls

-Watching people eat

-My daddy's beard

-Touching people's faces

Here are things I do not like:

-When my mommy and daddy go to work

-Nap time, even though I do it

-Being on my stomach

-My acid reflux

-My mommy ignoring my hollering

-Relief Society, so my mommy is making me try out Elder's Quorum with my daddy

-Going to the dentist with my mommy

-Getting my nose suctioned out

-Having my fingernails cut/filed

-Not being the center of attention

-Doing things I do not want to do

Here are things I am working on:

-Being patient

-Telling what I want nicely

-Having a better attitude when it's nap time

-Being quiet in Relief Society

-Being motivated to roll instead of my intense desire to stand and sit

-Being nice to my babysitter in the afternoons

Shake It

Baby loves music and loves dancing.  As you know, Baby has not been easy.  He didn't grow out of colic until 4 and half months, he was chronically sleep deprived due to acid reflux and sensitivity to stimulation, and he has struggled with constipation.  BUT, every Wednesday evening was different.  We had a standing date in the basement to watch our favorite show, So You Think You Can Dance.  His favorite contestant was Joshua and he NEVER, EVER cried or fussed when Joshua was on stage.  I have videos of him watching but it's hard to see the television and so I included him dancing to one of his favorite songs instead to show you how bright he gets when listening to music.  

He likes all sorts of music.  We start our mornings with CMT while he eats his breakfast.  His favorite songs are Jessica Simpson, Come on Over and Brand Paisely, Waiting on a Woman.  

Radio favorites include anything by Usher, Chris Brown, and Timbaland. He also likes Apologize by One Republic.  Baby's cousin is an avid music lover, I think they will have many things in common!

Baby and Usher

Being a Therapist

I don't talk about some things out of deep respect...so I am left with vague expressions to describe soul-deep mourning.

When in the presence of genuine suffering it is my response to fix it or at least offer comfort. But sometimes it is necessary, therapeutic, to let them suffer. I did that today. I only hope it was worth it.

THEY FIT

For the last two weeks I have risen, on work days, at 5:15 am to work out.  Some days I even worked out twice.  There were no days off, not even Sunday.  All for the goal of fitting into my pre-pregnancy clothes.  I'm not the type of person that has to lose weight.  I don't really care how much I weigh as long as I look good in my clothes.  And let me tell you, I didn't look so good in my clothes after Baby came along.  In fact, it was depressing.  Not so much because of my vanity, but because of my pocketbook.  I have spent a lot of time, energy, and money on building my wardrobe and I hate wasting time, I really hate expending energy for no reason, and I REALLY REALLY HATE wasting money. 

It has all paid off, at least almost.  I fit into my tightest pair of jeans today!  Woo-hoo.  I love those jeans.  They are low rise with a flare leg.  They have rips all over and on the back pocket is a stitched rainbow.  They sound ugly by my description but they are all ME.  They make me feel good and they make me look good.  I figure I still have two inches to come off of my waist to make them fit like they did before.  But hey, I can button them and in the female world, that is all that matters.

P.S.  My 16 year-old six pack is returning--I didn't even think that was possible.  You'll have to tune in to see if, when I lose the two inches, I post a picture.  BTW, it's the six-pack I only had as a sixteen year-old.   

Utah

There's a few things that set the state of Utah apart from other states:

1.  Pioneer Day, today

This is a holiday that is only celebrated here in Utah.  A day to celebrate the travails of Utah founders (that is the white settlers).  The American Indians, the Utes as one example, 'founded' Utah long before.  I spent my Pioneer Day shopping with Baby.  I had the bright idea to run errands but everywhere I needed to go was closed...I don't know about you, but I have a hard time enjoying a mid-week holiday as a holiday should be enjoyed.  The anticipation of having to go back to work tomorrow squeezes the fun right out of it.  It was nice to have an FMLA-like day with Baby though.  Since he is older we could do more things like work out, be out of the house for a whole four hours, etc.  I think he liked having me home.

2.  The Seagull is the state bird.

For those of you non-Utahns out there, here's why. When the Pioneers (those I am commemorating today) arrived in the Salt Lake Valley it was quite miserable including marsh-like conditions, mosquitos, and other sorts of nuisances everyone hates when they move into a new home...

That first planting season an unfortunate even occurred:  locusts came by the millions and began eating the crops to nothing.  The Pioneers, being a faithful people, prayed that God would spare their crops.  A miracle happened.  Seagulls came and at all of the locusts saving the settler's crops.  There is a monument at Temple Square now which depicts the miracle.

3.  The Loads of Mormons

Do I need to say anything more about that?  

But, as a result of the numerous Mormons there are funny things about Utah:

4.  The State the Consumes the Most Jello 

compared to all of the other states.  In fact, though I'm not sure how official this is, Jello is the state food.

5.  The Largest Organ in the world

lives in the Tabernacle at Temple Square (Salt Lake City).  Apparently some of the pipes are so big an adult man can stand comfortably inside.  Although, I'm not sure how comfortable a nearly 200 year old pipe could really be.

6. The Golden Spike

which it seems every business in Weber Co. was named after.  The Golden Spike was where the Union Pacific and the Trans-Atlantic railroads met creating a glorious moment in history for consumerism and capitalism.  

7.  The Salt Lake

My dad would go to Utah from time to time when I was a kid and I remember thinking (being born and raised in Oregon and having never stepped foot in Utah until I was 17) the Salt Lake was probably the most beautiful lake on earth.  Well, in all reality (not to let down others' childhood fantasies) the Salt Lake is one of the ugliest and grossest lakes on earth.  It stinks.  I live approximately four miles from the north eastern shoreline and oh boy when the wind blows right (or wrong) it smells like someone let out a SBD; this can last for days.  

L and I had our engagement pictures at Antelope Island which is one of many islands in the Great Salt Lake and they turned out fab but we had to endure the elements:  the stink, the millions and millions of bugs--which in the pictures look like a cool photographer trick to make the bottom of the picture hazy...that's how many there actually was, the blazing hot sun because there is zero natural shade--nothing grows naturally because of the salt, the brine shrimping boats--not like Bubba Gump shrimping boats (brine shrimp feed your pet fish), etc.

8.  Narcissistic Drivers

I was listening to a radio show the other day with a Truck Driver as a guest and he said there are places that actually are worse than Utah when it comes to bad driving--he said St. Louise is really bad.

9.  The Best Snow on Earth

So proclaims the Utah license plate.  L is an avid skier and I of course am not.  I didn't think there could be much difference in snow but apparently I was wrong...a girl I used to work with had moved to Utah from NYC and I asked her one day how she liked the severe and jarring difference in culture and she said it doesn't bother her much.  When I showed my surprise she said, "Everything I deal with culturally is worth it because Utah has the best snow on earth."  She then went to on to say she has skied all over the world, including the Alps, and she said that Utah's snow is by far the best and that is the ENTIRE reason she moved and has stayed.  

I did some research...Utah's snow is so good because of the Great Salt Lake (so it is good for something).  When the lake evaporates there is some salt in the evaporation and when it condenses into snow it creates a very light and fluffy snow--good for skiing and falling (mostly why I now appreciate it).  This is unlike the heavy and wet snow Oregon gets.

9.  Salt

Because of the wealth of salt, Utah salts their freeways and roads instead of sanding them during snow storms.  Salt drops the freezing temperature which allows my place of employment demand I show up on time no matter how snowy it is.

10.  Crappy Roads and Crappy Cars

As a result of all of the snow and salt.  The salt eats the pavement and eats car paint.  The underbelly of a Utah car (and sadly the top part of our Hon.da) are usually rusty.

11.  Temples

In Utah there is a plethora of Mormon Temples which are magnificent buildings.  If you are standing at one point on I215, or standing at one place in the SLC airport you can see two temples at once--the Salt Lake Temple (probably the most famous one, the one that looks like a castle) to the east and the Bountiful Temple to the north.  I bet you could actually see three or almost four (as one is being constructed right now) if you stood on one of the Western Mountains.  

12.  You Always Know Where You Are

which is one of my favorite things about Utah.  The big mountains are on the East and so you can always gauge which direction you are going.  Plus, Utah cities have been built on a grid system which makes finding anything a breeze.  

That is not the only reason you always know where you are.  It is just as hard to forget you're in Utah as it is to forget you are in Venice.  Different reasons, Utah culture just screams from every nook and cranny...

13.  Big Hair

Utahns seem to have large and in charge hair.  I'm not sure the cultural roots of this phenomenon but I have a snide/sarcastic guess:  Utahns are a traditional people and maybe they have not altogether let go of the pompodeor (My spell check didn't offer me any other spellings for that word). 

14.  BYU

My alma-mater.  The institution that brought me to Utah.  BYU is a beautiful school--you should go there sometime just to appreciate how nice it is.  BUT, I didn't always appreciate my time there for reasons that would necessitate a separate blog entry.  Any-hoo, BYU is the most efficient and busy school in the world.  I read, in my BYU magazine, that BYU has something going on in nearly every building on campus every single day of every single year.   And I complain about my electric bill!

15.  Swamp Coolers

Because it is arid here we can use these contraptions to cool our house that are not A/C.  And they actually work.  Except if you have ever been to my house in the summer you are thinking to yourself, "Uh, yours doesn't work."  You are correct.  Our sucks.  It has a 1 horse power engine, which is huge if you think that sounds small.  Sometimes I imagine it is a real horse up there driving my swamp cooler engine and I wish I had a jockey with a whip to get that thing going...so that my house actually cools down.

Anyway, this is how they work:  It is a box that holds pads on the walls of the box.  Inside the engine turns a fan while water is sprayed from a shower-type thing onto the pads (cooling them).  The fan catches the cool air and blows it into the house.  Along with all sorts of unwanted things like bugs, allergens, dirt, oil (from the 1 horse engine)--and you know how I feel about my white carpet, rain (it sits on the roof), lightening (unfortunately for a friend of mine), and noise.

This is where I will end because I am going to celebrate the Pioneers more by watching family members blow things up.  Feel free to add your own observations about Utah...

ALTHOUGH I DON'T EXPECT MUCH SINCE MY READERS DON'T EVER COMMENT...

Quirks

Something L said the other day made me think about his quirkiness which led me to think about my quirkiness and then Baby's quirkiness. Here are a few about us you might find funny and/or interesting...or maybe it's just me who thinks they are funny and/or interesting

L:

-You know that "Tic Toc" Madonna and JT song? It really bothers him that a) there is only four minutes to save the world. He says that is just not enough time. Hasn't he seen any James Bond movies? and b) that the song does not delineate what exactly is destroying the world.

-He will use no other toilet paper than Char.min Ult.ra, the most expensive.

-He does not throw away trash, bring things in, or spot clean his car (all taking but a few seconds or minutes) but he will spend hours and hours detailing it.

-He will all out clean the kitchen floor but will not put the mop and bucket away.

-He used to refuse to wear white shirts to church, calling them lame but now he wears nothing other than white shirts to church while all of his other ones we bought over the years collect dust.

-His morality cannot handle the following: cigarette smoking and tattoos. Just reading this will start him on a soliloquy about them.

-He always thinks he has food poisoning.

-He cannot turn down free food.

-He thinks all free food is good food, even when it makes him sick, even though he worries about food poisoning.

-He wants his birthday celebrated for the entire month, and he thinks everyone that has ever met him should attend a mass celebration to express their gratitude he was born.

-He always "Knows a Guy" who will "Hook Him Up."

-He calls his classic Camaro his "weekend car" although he only drives it in the summer, rarely on weekends.

-He LOVES soy milk

M:

-I will not wear white shoes, white pants, or a white skirt after labor day or before Easter. But off-white is acceptable and so is a white dress.

-I do not wear any other color but white socks, and on the occasion I do, I stress out all day about it.

-No matter how much I try, I cannot spell 'occasion' correctly.

-I refuse to use the word "Binkie". I have caved on the others.

-I hate being late but love leaving early

-'Gift shops' at museums and or theme parks really annoy me, except the one at Tillamook Cheese Factory.

-I can't stop eating Che.x Party Mix until I become physically ill and even that does not avert me to later Che.x Party Mix binges.

-I have allowed my Cilantro to die for the third summer in a row even though I totally know how not to kill it.

-I love Hip Hop music but I am not a teenager, nor did I grow up in Urban America.

-I could spend all day, every day watching Fo.od Net.work.

-I like living in Utah.  I'm not sure when this happened and I can't believe I am admitting it!

-I pick my nose in the car and I think is funny when I get caught.

-I named my cat Damnit and I have no intention of changing her name for Baby's sake.  (Side Story:  the other day she ran off while we were outside and we began a frantic search through the neighbor's--aka the RS President--yard yelling Damnit's name at the top of our lungs!)

-I am an Eagle Eye, much to L's dismay.

-I can yo-yo like nobody's business and sometimes when I have a no-show at work I yo-yo in my office.

-My sense of smell is so sensitive I have gone to great lengths to avoid smells I know I don't like including refusing to take classes in one of the BYU buildings.

-I can type 100 words a minute and was the apple of my high school keyboarding teacher's eye (her name was Ms. Hag and boy did she live up to her name, but I secretly loved her).

-I once wrote a professional letter that simply said, "Boo-ya."

Baby:

-He laughs only once per week, on average.

-He always gets hiccups after he laughs, which is probably why he only laughs once a week.

-He fake sleeps at bedtime (it is really cute and funny).

-He will only nap, well, in a swing.

-His favorite toy is this plush female (it's name on the tag is Lily) frog.

-When hysterical he will not calm down for Mommy or Daddy, but will for Usher without fail.

-He loves Hip Hop music even though he is not a teenager, nor does he live in Urban America.

-When he is pooping he pushes so loud it attracts crowds and/or snickering glances in public.

-His transitional item is a cloth diaper spit rag.

-He LOVES soy milk.

Please feel free to list your quirks...

A Week of Firsts

Baby has had many firsts this week:

His first 4th of July which is my favorite holiday--by far, hands down, no questions asked.

And with the 4th of July came his first parade! Which he LOVED. He cried at the first siren but after that he squealed with delight at the sirens and the horses. Despite the parade being through his morning nap, he was in an excellent mood.  Look how intent his face is while he is watching the parade.

Baby had his first fit of diarrhea this week.  It was incredibly messy.  In my wildest baby nightmares (pre-baby) I never imagined there would be poop all over my house.   Sometimes reality hits when you least expect it to.  The doctor recommended Pedia.lite. Why?  Babies hate Pedia.lite--no matter what the flavor.  Baby is a good eater and even likes and gobbles down and cries for more medicine including gas drops, Baby Tylen.ol, and Prev.acid for his acid reflux

He had his first trip to L's family land in Idaho too. He had a hard time sleeping with so many people around but he enjoyed his first bonfire, his first camping trip, and his first road trip. Did he cry? Yes he did. BUT, he has started playing with his car seat toys and that really helped occupy him when he wasn't sleeping.

Yesterday was his first day in daycare, babysitting. She is a friend of a co-worker who babysits their child as well. We met her a few weeks ago and Baby was taken with her two year-old. And this morning when I dropped him off I watched him follow the two year-old with his eyes for several minutes.  My friend dropped his son off later in the day then came to work and reported that his and the babysitter's sons were dancing around Baby chanting his name.  Isn't that cute?  

I surprised myself and haven't totally obsessed about babysitting-gone-wrong-nightmare scenarios either day.  Both days when I picked him up he was happily sleeping in the swing. Plus, her little boy apparently vigilantly makes sure that the swing is rocking and the toys are moving for him at all times.  She said he took four--that's right--four naps.  I think her house is magic because my friend's son refuses to talk and eat at home but will both talk and eat at the babysitter's.  Baby refuses to nap at home and he naps at her house.  To make things even better, he transitioned home very easily and slept well through the night.  Incredible. 

Commuting

Today was my first day to work as a nurse. All we did is orientation, which I think I slept through about 2 of the 8 hrs worth of lecture. Pretty boring. I have been wanting to take the train to work since it is paid for by the university. I have not been able to though as a tech because I had to be to work before the train get get me to work so I had to drive. I have to say that it is really awesome. I am actually writing  this blog on the train. They have free wi-fi which is so cool. What will be really great is I will be able to finish all of my didactic work form the internship on the train. Not to mention saving around $10 in fuel a day. So far mass transit rocks.