The Month To Give Thanks

November is the time to give thanks. Well, thank you to the following:

Threats—without them I wouldn’t have a job

The lady who cut me off nearly killing me and Baby this morning—because seeing her a mile later on the side of the freeway with smoke pouring out from the hood reminded me that Karma makes life worth it

My company’s IT department—giving me an excuse to have a bad attitude

People with poor hygiene—because they make me look good

Gossip—gives me something to talk about

The 11 fast food restaurants within a mile from my house—for allowing me to give myself a treat each time I don’t eat there

Teenage Angst—earns me a paycheck

Family Feuds—gives me an outlet for my aggression

My Slow Work Computer—the reason I stare out my office window and gaze at the Purple Mountains Majesty instead of completing my paperwork

Other People’s Problems—making me thankful for my own

My Problems—making me thankful I have these problems and not those problems

Idaho, As an Oregonian—75 MPH B……iotch! And that is the only reason Idaho is to be thanked

IPhone—makes me look more important than I really am

Baby crying all night long—‘cause I’m always looking for a reason to miss Monday’s staff meeting

Food Poisoning—A quick way to lose those extra pounds

Politics—makes it socially acceptable to say socially unacceptable things about people

Gangs—without which my current nemesis wouldn’t have had their car tagged last week. HAHAHAHAHA! Nothing beats a large SK on the passenger door, eh?

Dexter—I’ve never had such a good time questioning my morality

V8 Engines—an excuse to never be the driver

L forgetting chapstick in his pocket for the umpteenth time when I do the laundry—the reason I have the most expensive pair of jeans I will ever own

4 year-olds—for saying what we’re all thinking

Good Intentions—for paving the road to hell I’m on, it's a lot less bumby now

My brother and sister-in-laws on L’s side—never a dull minute. And for giving me something to look forward to in Spring and Fall, the bi-annual swimming pool cleaning. You’ve never heard such yelling, swearing, crying, and screeching coming from a neighbor’s yard.

My Father-in-Law’s Twine Pile—looking at it from Google earth is a wonder

What are you thankful for this year?