On Maturation, Pt. 4

The question I have been asked far more than any other question (besides: "When are you due?" and "Do you know what you're having?"--but those don't count) during my pregnancies is this: "Are you going to breast or bottle feed?"

That question really bothered me through my now 18 months of pregnancy. I figured it was no one's business but my own. I was only lectured, thoroughly, once when I answered that I was planning to formula feed Hip but I certainly got a lot of questioning looks and voice tones.

I had a lot of very valid reasons for formula feeding Hip. There are many that are personal and others that are very difficult to explain to people who have not walked a mile in my shoes, so I don't attempt. It was the right choice at the time. I felt confident in that. I still feel confident in that choice.

Those reasons, for Poquito, were no longer valid...except the one where I was nervous to try something new and quite frankly I didn't want to. One girl had the nerve to ask me, "Is it because you don't want your boobs to get saggy?"

"You're an idiot," is what I would have said if I wasn't trying to make friends with several other girls in attendance.

I was certainly on the fence about what to do until I was forced to make a decision in the hospital. I had made the lucky mistake of admitting my ambivalence to my pushy nurse. She, without my consent, called the lactation consultant who immediately thrust her hands all up in my business. I was too ticklish to be pissed.

My confidence in myself, after my delivery experience, was very high and I reasoned with myself, if I can deliver a big baby naturally than I can at least try to breast feed. Accepting my nervousness/fears and my confidence I gave in to the lactation consultant's gropes and advice.

Poquito was a natural. I continued to be ticklish.

It was a success. Poquito has only had about 5 mL of formula on day 2 of his existence. Otherwise he hasn't even drank from a bottle.

If you've known me these past several years of my life you may be scratching your head wondering if you really know me at all. Maybe you feel proud of me. Maybe you realize that even people like me can change, do something new, and can mature.

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I'm not going to gush about how much I love breast feeding because I don't. I don't hate it either. I just do it and embrace the fact that there are pros and cons. There are pros and cons--just opposite--to formula feeding too.